Lately

I've been hanging out at my older sister's place lately, getting to babysit nieces and ride to the bookstore with my other sister to work crazy crazy Education Week. It has been good times. Between the bookstore and catering, I worked almost 40 hours by Wedenesday, so both jobs told me thursday morning that I wasn't allowed to anything more as BYU rules don't permit any student to work overtime. Something about their "status as a private university". It didn't bother me to leave, though I could have used the extra hours. More hide-and-go-seek, ice cream, and Dora the Explorer for me. Did you know that "lobos" is Spanish for wolves? I didn't.

Wiggle, we really should start that pre-school. And Given, you really should design it with Deanne and set up your interior design business next door. AND THEN you two could design JD's nightclub, which naturally would be next to our two facilities. Unlce Ring Bearer could come and say hi to the kids in our pre-school and pay them money to do things for him, and Uncle Smurf could entertain them with impressions of David Bowie's "Dance, Magic Dance" from the hit film "Labyrinth" after they had beginning lessons in German (they actually taught us how to count and say things in German at my pre-school in Santa Clara as I recall) from the Deutschlander. Ah, what times that would make for eh? We should all just pitch in for a giant strip mall, or section of downtown. If you're reading this, you're invited to come start a business there. What could you do with your space? Hehe.

Silliness sustains me.

Career Options high on my list of consideration today (though they change quite regularly):

A) Pre-school/Kindergarten teacher (As Wiggle reports, "All you have to know is your colors, numbers, and shapes and you get paid for it!" I would love that...)
B) President of the United States and/or senator (possibly Rep. in the House,maybe even some other sort of politician, we'll see)
C) Zuchini Farmer (such a versatile vegetable...)
D) Next great red-headed film star in Hollywood (after the military stint of course)

Speaking of film, wow...I don't know if this UofU guy can be invited anywhere anymore, even just out of niceness and courtesy. I hate that. I really can't afford to like him though. Or anyone for that matter. *Arrrghaaablarghab. Grumble.* But man, he's cool... And being a jerk sucks.

I'm going to try to be more serious now. I'm trying to work on my focusing. Sometimes I come of as totally retarded instead of just mildy so, simply because my mind won't stay on one track of thought for more than 30 seconds without this incredibly strenuous effort.

For instance, there was this woman in the bookstore today who asked me a question. I had no idea what she had asked because despite the fact that I was looking her straight in the eye, seemingly as attentive as can be, I wasn't listening to a word she said. I was thinking about something completely different...which I can't remember for the life of me right now. When she stopped saying words, I awakened from my innattentiveness and all I could think to say was "My, you have beautiful eyes M'am," even though I didn't.

Luckily, my coworker who was sitting next to me the whole time caught the rebound and answered her question. She wanted to know about children's hats I think...or little kid cheerleader outfits...or hmm. I really don't know. But that's the point, you see. No focus.

And as I can't think of anything more to say on that topic, I shall move on. The serious thing isn't working. And neither is the focus. A serious, more focused post will have to come later.

Another lady from St. George, Utah came to my register and bought "How to Win Friends and Influence People for Teen Girls." She was getting it for her daughter. How horrible is that? Are things really supposed to work like that? Hell, what do I know about it. Maybe I should give it a read. But holy crap, that's so...counterfeit? dubious? wrong?. I would hate for MY teen sister to have some girl come along who was learning how to be her friend from a book about manipulating people. I really can't stomach that. And yet, I sense that to many people, in fact many of the most skilled people at making friends and influencing people, see it as this sort of desperate game with tactics and rules and cunning involved. Like, "this friend counts for this many points" and "that friend for that many points" and whoever has the least points is a square. This makes me feel ill-at-ease...and slightly square.

I move into my new apartment Monday. I'm thrilled to be doing so. Change is a healthy constant. I am going to start fresh with some things and be better, kinder, smarter, harder-working. And I'm going to try to be more involved in church even when it's painful. Mark my words.

Something about having to stay in Provo and go to BYU makes my insides itch though. I really think it's time for a move, or at least an extended vacation. Something inside me wants to go away, and I'm not even sure it's bad. Hopefully just moving within Provo will be enough.

Time to go to bed now. Its late and the mind wanders to places where words do not easily follow. Goodnight.