Friday, March 03, 2006

I went to Golden Corral tonight for the first time. My aunt is in town, so the family called up and we all went to dinner. I would hate to work at Golden Corral. It would be like living in the section of hell designated just for gluttony. There are all these enormous people there with their tubby kids eating plate after plate of food and these poor employees kept having to clean up after them; plate after plate, dish after dish, table after table. It was kind of surreal in a gross circus clown kind of way.

Not that I dislike buffets. I love them. I ate three and a half plates of food. My little brother had like, six. I'm just saying it must really suck for the workers there. They must really hate fat people who eat in front of them. They probably want to shoot them. And then make soap out of their body fat. This is why I can never get a job at the Golden Corral.

I need to learn to be entertaining. Like, telling stories and jokes and stuff. Or learning to put my legs behind my head, or dislocate my shoulders or some crap like that that makes people laugh or have fun. I can be so boring sometimes it hurts. And this is mostly around people who I don't want to be boring around. I've been seriously considering checking out a joke book or something from the library. How lame is that? Pretty freakin lame.

One of the coolest verses in the New Testament:
Mark 5:9
Pretty spooky huh? gives me goose bumps. Jesus is a stud.

I think I'm going to hire a Mexican to do my Spanish homework for me.

Oprah is one of my heroes. Err....heroines. She's an amazing role model and one of the most awesome, generous, down to earth people on the planet. I think we knew each other in the pre-existence. We were probably friends.


4 comments:

el veneno said...

Golden Corral... ah... makes me remember my Grandpa. That was his favorite restaurant. He also happened to be one of those enormous people... and he was skinny like me at my age. Maybe I should add some Golden Corral to my diet.

We think alike sometimes. I've been thinking I need to be more entertaining too. Last night I was chilling with Gilmore Guy who is like my clone and we basically just sat in silence. Neither one of us had anything interesting to say or do (he actually has a lot more tricks than I do, like guitar playing and stuff but he just didn't feel like wasting them on me). So the funny thing is that I was thinking I need to be more interesting cause it sucks when I start to bore myself, but I was also thinking "this awkward silence never happens when Pinetree is here." Maybe it's just that 3 people is more exciting than 2 or maybe you're an entertaining person and just don't know it. Still, it would be a little more entertaning if you could put your legs behind your head.

gilmore guy said...

Golden Corral brings to mind thoughts of a feed lot on the prairie. Is the point to beef up the public? Why? I equlaly dislike the name "Chuck-o-rama". How can the founders not have thought that "Up-chuck-o-rama" would come to mind when people would think of that name.

Yeah it's true. Veneno and I chill in silence often. It's because I have nothing to say, and even if I did, he already knows what I'm thinking. That's why we like it when you hang out with us. Fresh perspective.

blueshorts said...

Frankly, I've never been bored around any of you. And I usually consider myself to be quite boring. I imagine that I wouldn't really be bored even if I was sitting in silence with any of you. My mind would be racked with trying to think of something to say to break the silence, and thus I'd keep myself very entertained with thoughts that I'd probably be too embarassed to actually say aloud until prompted.

Christmas Smurf said...

And he asked him, What is thy name? And he answered, saying, My name is Legion: for we are many.

okaaaayyy...